Rules to live by:
· pray for honesty and courage;
· allow no outside influence;
· do not take this inventory while mad, but answer each question honestly;
Over time, your scores should change as you retake this inventory, and as the marriage is strengthened. I would suggest that your spouse take this inventory independent of you, but agree to come together to assess and to share your scores openly.
Scoring Numbers | |||||
|
1. __My spouse hides money? | 21. __Verbal abuse happens in the home? |
2. __My spouse is being sexually unfaithful? | 22. __My sex marriage is unsatisfying? |
3. __We argue in our marriage? | 23. __My attitude is negative about marriage? |
4. __My spouse physically abuses me? | 24. __Do you often sleep in another room? |
5. __My spouse insults me in conversation? | 25. __Are there hidden/unpaid bills in the home? |
6. __Are you sexually frustrated with your spouse? | 26. __Are you intimately detached from your spouse? |
7. __My spouse spends more time away from the home? | 27. __Do conversations often turn into arguments? |
8. __Do you often wish you married someone else? | 28. __Do drugs and/or alcohol lead to physical abuse? |
9. __Do you argue over finances? | 29. __We struggle to forgive in our marriage? |
10. __My spouse is involved with someone else? | 30. __Are you disinterested in sex with your spouse? |
11. __Are you finding it hard to communicate? | 31. __Have you talked about divorce? |
12. __My spouse frightens and intimidates me? | 32. __Have you become disinterested in the marriage? |
13. __Insults are often used in our marriage? | 33. __Is money always missing? |
14. __Is your marriage sexually incompatible? | 34. __Is porn in the marriage? |
15. __Is your marriage life outside the home very busy? | 35. __Finding it hard agreeing on how to raise children? |
16 .__Are you emotionally thinking of someone else? | 36. __Do you hide physical bruises and scars? |
17. __Is money a defensive topic in the home? | 37. __Does your spouse have an addiction? |
18. __Do you think your spouse wants someone else? | 38. __Uncomfortable talking about sex with your spouse? |
19. __Do your children see you argue with your spouse? | 39. __Do you feel expectations have not been met? |
20. __Physical abuse happens in the home? | 40. __Have you lost interest in your marriage? |
Follow these directions to figure your score.
1. Place in each box your numerical response (0-4) from the actual question.
2. Add across the numbers in the box and put in the total box.
Score Card
Financial Problems | + Item 1 | + Item 9 | + Item 17 | + Item 25 | + Item 33 | = | |
Sexual Infidelity | + Item 2 | + Item 10 | + Item 18 | + Item 26 | + Item 34 | = | |
Communication Breakdown | + Item 3 | + Item 11 | + Item 19 | + Item 27 | + Item 35 | = | |
Physical Abuse | + Item 4 | + Item 12 | + Item 20 | + Item 28 | + Item 36 | = | |
Emotional Abuse | + Item 5 | + Item 13 | + Item 21 | + Item 29 | + Item 37 | = | |
Sexual Problems | + Item 6 | + Item 14 | + Item 22 | + Item 30 | + Item 38 | = | |
Shift in Priorities | + Item 7 | + Item 15 | + Item 23 | + Item 31 | + Item 39 | = | |
Loss of Interest | + Item 8 | + Item 16 | + Item 24 | + Item 32 | + Item 40 | = | |
Total | |||||||
0-40 | Marriage is good |
41-80 | Marriage needs work |
81-120 | Marriage is failing |
121-140 | Divorce is in question |
This marriage inventory was created and published by Victor Hudson Ministries. Do not use for purposes of reprinting, distributing, and financial gain without permission.
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